Love

Why does a human being have to fall in love? It makes things so inconvenient! I was happy being not in love, single, happy go lucky, just independent and going on with my life. And someone amazing drops into my life, after a long time, I am actually interested in someone, and of course, he is interested in being single and exploring the meaning of life, rather than the meaning of us. I am saddened by this. I want to be patient, though. I want to let time take its toll and let time do its things. Eventually everything works out well enough, that is the theory anyway. I think everything works out in the end. I know everything works out in the end. Patience is definitely the key. Then, why do I feel like a douchebag, why do I feel horrible, like everything is going wrong, why am I being so negative. I saw on his facebook post that he was out gallivanting about town yesterday. That made my heart sink. He probably found some gorgeous girl who doesn’t want to be in a relationship and snogged with her all night. Isn’t that what most guys want? He probably bought her back to his place and then they did it, in the same place we did it a few weeks ago. How daring of him, how dare he. Anyway, its all in my imagination, all in my head. Our mental interpretation of things cause us more pain than the actual reality.
I want peace, and thinking about it is not going to help.

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